Out of the thousands of movies I’ve watched over many years, this is one of the few that resonates so vividly in my own life experiences. In fact, it was embarrassing, sad, and triggering all at the same time. It’s mid-1980s setting roared vividly back to life dredging up memories of my own unhappy teen years. It was also another reminder confirming why it was necessary for me to eventually break away from the mind-controlling toxicity of the Jehovah’s Witness cult. They have numerous obsessions with “sins” of all sorts, but the common thread that runs through all film narratives about Jehovah’s Witnesses centers around their particular fixation on supposedly aberrant sexuality and Confessions Of A Teenage Jesus Jerk is no different in that respect.
Confessions was adapted for the screen from the novel of the same name by Tony DuShane and is semi-autobiographical. Also of note, the film version is the first directorial effort by Eric Stoltz, a well-known actor of numerous film and television roles since the early 1980s. Confessions is set in suburban, Northern California centering around the sexual awakening of 16-year-old horn dog Gabe (Sasha Feldman) existing in a world of stifling repression. While the movie is marketed as a “dramedy” it doesn’t function well in any comedic capacity, but does better dramatically, exposing the absurdities and hypocrisy of Jehovah’s Witness dogmas.
Gabe cannot come to grips with his budding sexuality and talk about it honestly with his strict overbearing father or alcoholic mother. There isn’t anyone else in his local congregation to share his feelings with either. He would likely be ostracized or disfellowshipped (which is the more accurate term) from the rest of the congregation for anyone found guilty of violating any strict rules of conduct. After all, it would be awkward at best for him to talk about secretly masturbating to pictures of women wearing lingerie in department store catalogs. “Impure” sexual thoughts and (anything outside of monogamous marriage) in the Jehovah’s Witnesses realm is enough to get you in big trouble — to speak nothing of acting on them!
Then again, the Governing Body of Jehovah’s Witnesses stubbornly continue in their failure to understand that sexuality can only be suppressed so much, never eradicated from the lives of its members. The inability of the Governing Body to grasp the biological and psychological realities of life where sexuality is concerned is utterly ridiculous and unlikely to change any time soon. Despite this, there is a variety of sexual indiscretions occurring among with other characters throughout Confessions Of A Teenage Jesus Jerk illustrating just how emotionally screwed up many Jehovah’s Witnesses are, finding it impossible to reconcile their sexual realities with strict religious dogmas.
Although I found the film realistic to similar actual life situations that I and other former Witnesses have experienced, it’s unfortunate that Confessions did not further engage some other themes and develop other characters more. For instance, the narrative should have explored the secret alcoholism of Gabe’s mother which would have enhanced the drama. This is one of the more depressing side effects of existing and trying to cope with life within a repressive religious structure like that of the Witnesses. I also found it curious that Gabe’s father allowed him to continue associating with an uncle who was clearly not a Jehovah’s Witness, and whose lifestyle is in direct conflict with their teachings and principles.
Anyone who is not a Witness in good standing is considered to be “worldly” and unsuitable for association with — whether they are related by blood, marriage or otherwise. The obvious anger issues that Gabe’s father grapples with could have been developed further as well. It seems that the pressures of being one of the congregation elders is more than he can handle, and it would have been enlightening as to how he was appointed to that position to counsel others about their so-called sins.
Among other things, though, Confessions accurately portrays that snitching and surveillance are necessary tools for keeping members under control. Those are the main tactics that allow domineering cults and religions like Jehovah’s Witnesses to continue their fascist regimes with impunity. All things considered, despite some narrative flaws the film provides sobering insight into the distressed lives of many Witnesses happening behind the joyous, righteous, unified front their literature and Governing Body puts out in the world.
